Today, let’s talk frankly and honestly about something we don’t like to admit we feel. Let’s talk about the space where fatigue and hopelessness coexist. Let’s talk about the isolation and despair we attempt to manage by ourselves because to admit we feel it is to admit defeat. And let’s talk about all we do and say to distract from it.
Let’s talk about Feeling Overwhelmed
Why do women feel drained by life? Perhaps it is that many female role models are go-getting, non-stop, girl-bosses who seem to do it all. This unintended pressure creates a sense that if we ask for help or simply say “no, I cannot do that” we are disappointing those we serve and nurture. After all, our Fore-Mothers could do it and they didn’t even have all the conveniences and shortcuts we have today. Now with the click of a button or a quick text, we can solve many, problems. And not just our own, but now we have the capacity to solve others‘ problems too!
It’s a fallacy because the overwhelm, the burden and the weight we carry isn’t a functional deficit but an emotional one. We have no more in the tank, we’ve reached capacity, we are out of bandwidth. And moving our bodies may feel productive but emotionally we are untethered. You may notice that you cannot focus like you used to, you feel irritated, numb, wired but tired, or guilty. If so, you probably are experiencing some level of overwhelm.
The cost of unaddressed feelings of being overwhelmed is high and wide. Our jobs can be affected where motivation is waning. Or our family could be affected as we are “always cranky” or “in a bad mood.” Taking time to notice and reflect on what is happening feels like a luxury we cannot afford. But to skip over it, to put those feelings back on the shelf doesn’t serve you nor does it serve the ones you love.
Often, the only place the slowdown happens is in therapy. It is a safe confidential space where you can feel seen and heard and validated. I am astounded by the number of women I see who say “so I can just tell them no?” There are weeks that women come back and tell me how much better they felt after just letting it all go. Therapy for burnout and emotional exhaustion is a real and substantial part of my practice.
Here you’ll have a chance to catch your breath, and think about what you are experiencing and even where it lives in your body! You can Pause rather than Push! Therapy can go as deep as you allow it. You can learn breath-work, or meditation and grounding techniques or redefine who you want to be or give yourself permission to let go of perfectionism. It is finding out that you are enough, loveable, worthy.
So consider taking one hour per week from your hectic schedule to speak to a trained professional willing to help. Asking for support doesn’t mean you failed, it means you are laying groundwork for new successes.
